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Israeli election campaign clips: seriously hilarious

There’s never a dull moment in the Israel Ward of the Middle East Insane Asylum. In Gaza they’re still counting corpses while reporters, banned from the territory during the military campaign, climb over the rubble, interviewing people and trying to reconstruct what happened over the previous month. Meanwhile, over here in Israel, we’re on to the next big drama – national elections.

The pollsters are causing liberals and social democrats to reach for the anti-anxiety meds. Apparently Likud, led by Benjamin (Bibi) Netanyahu (a.k.a. the worst prime minister in the history of Israel, a little factoid won’t distract the amnesiacs who plan to vote for him) is poised to win the most seats, in which case he would have an opportunity to show us all that he hasn’t changed one bit since the last time he was prime minister. Given that Avigdor (Yvet) Lieberman’s far-right Yisrael Beiteinu seems set to win an unprecedented number of seats, Bibi would probably ask him to join the coalition – in return for important ministries like…never mind, I don’t want to think about it.

So, quick summary for readers unfamiliar with Israeli politics:

  • There are 120 seats in the Knesset
  • The governing party or coalition must have a minimum of 61 seats (most seek about 70, to minimize the risk of rebellious coalition members withdrawing and leading to collapse of the government)
  • Israel’s fragmented multi-party system, with many small parties holding only two or three seats, means that no one party ever wins an absolute majority of seats
  • That means that the head of the party which wins the plurality of seats gets to be prime minister – after he woos a bunch of smaller parties to join his/her coalition, usually in exchange for important ministries (defense, education, finance, absorption) and/or a budget for projects important to their constituents (e.g., Shas is always after a bigger child allowance for their poor, religious and fecund Mizrachi constituents).
  • Right now, the three most important parties are, in ascending order, Labor (Barak), Kadima (Livni) and Likud (Netanyahu). According to Maariv newspaper’s latest poll, Yisrael Beiteinu would win 16 seats and Labor 17.
  • Full results of the Maariv poll: Likud 28, Kadima 23, Labor 17, Yisrael Beiteinu 16, Shas 10.

So in effect, the two main candidates for prime minister are Bibi Netanyahu and Tzipi Livni.

Ehud Barak

Here’s a photo I took last year of Ehud Barak, just after he cast his vote for the Labor party leadership. Note
the smarmy, self-satisfied expression. ;)

The broadcast authority allots each party a certain amount of television air time time for its campaign advertisements; and it is not possible to buy more time. So this election season, they are uploading their clips to YouTube and posting them on their party websites. Below is a selection of a few that caught my attention.

This is a clip of Bibi Netanyahu making a speech that’s all about strength: “Over the past few weeks, we have proven that we have a strong nation (refering to the Gaza campaign); we have proven that we have a strong army (ditto); now we need one more thing – a strong government.” (woo hoo! let’s be macho and kick lots of butt!) Check out Bibi’s website for more video clips; and while you’re there, check out his use of social media. Notice that his campaign is all about security, with little-to-no mention of social issues.

Lieberman does not have any campaign advertisements posted on his website, so I thought I’d bring you a charming little clip that I found on YouTube. It shows Yvet telling an Arab Member of Knesset that only he (Lieberman) understands the Arabs, and that Hamas would “take good care” of the Arab MK. It’s subtitled, so you can all enjoy the full racist horror.

Tzipi Livni’s campaign commercial actually depressed me the most. A blurry, unrecognizable figure moves through various corridors of power, surrounded by bodyguards and important-looking people, as the narrator says, “He was a decorated army officer. He served in the Mossad. He served as head of the Government Companies Authority. He was the Minister of Regional Security, Minister of Absorption and Justice Minister. He was Foreign Minister, a member of the security cabinet and substitute prime minister. He led international diplomacy efforts. No one would doubt that he could be prime minister – if he weren’t….a woman (as the pixels clear and Tzipi’s face is revealed).”
In other words, Tzipi is really a man  – except s/he has a vagina and breasts.

Okay, enough of the gloomy stuff. Let’s look at Hadash‘s campaign (Hadash is the Arab-Jewish Socialist party – Wikipedia entry here). Unlike the previous clips, which are in Hebrew with Russian subtitles, Hadash’s message is in Hebrew and Arabic with simultaneous subtitles in either language. This makes sense, since Arabic is Israel’s second official language and Russian is not an official language at all. In practice, however, the main parties know they have to appeal to the huge Russian immigrant population; they know they won’t get the popular Arab vote, although shady “vote contractors” regularly “buy” the votes of some Arab villages by offering the mukhtar, or clan leader, various benefits that they should have already had, but were denied due to neglect. During last year’s Labor primaries, for example, Infrastructure Minister Fuad Ben Eliezer (Labor) ordered the electricity company to hook some small villages up to the national grid (!) in exchange for their votes. The secular urban Arab vote tends to go to Hadash, Ram Ta’al or Balad.

Summary of the Hadash clip: a bunch of people (Arabs and Jews) say “obviously!”, then “obviously Hadash!” They trot out their platform/slogans: “two states for two nations”; workers’ rights; women’s rights; social justice; the leading force against the occupation; political left; social left; the real left; the party that achieved clean air legislation and a law granting women extended maternity benefits; the first to oppose the Second Lebanon War; the first to lead the opposition to the Gaza military campaign; the only list that has true cooperation between Jews and Arabs.

And now we come to the true piece de resistance. It’s the campaign advert for the Holocaust Survivors and Green Leaf (legalization of cannabis) party. I’m not making this up, people. This is a real party. The clip is subtitled, except for the first caption, which reads “this number – i.e., a concentration camp tattoo number -  is not good for credit”. Please move your liquids away from your computer before watching.

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23 Comments so far (Add 1 more)

  1. Tzipi’s a dude!! I KNEW it!!

    Thanks for the ‘liquids’ warning before watching the green leaf ad.. Priceless! Yes, I am sure that holocaust survivors feel very strongly about legalising pot and will vote for this party for that reason..

    I liked the Hadash one – not just because it was, in my opinion, quite well done, but also because it was the only one who featured the real essence of the election – people! No images of leaders here. I enjoyed that. And the use of Arabic – the second official language! – kudos.
    (though I wonder if it wasn’t a tad too much Arabic for the mainstream voter?).

    Tzipi’s ad was a little pathetic. I don’t know how much debate there was in Israel regarding her gender but the ad’s focus feels misplaced. Netanyahu is using the war – that he observed from the sidelines – more than she is. Come on, Liv!!

    I’m not sure whom I would vote for (you know, if asked for my opinion:) . I’d be tempted to go for Hadash, but then again I could bring myself to vote for Livni (!!!!!!) because a Bibi-led government, with Lieberman as minister of Defense (picture that – Lieberman with the nuclear codes!) and Feiglin as minister of the interior is a scary, scary thought.

    1. Mo-ha-med
    on January 31st, 2009 at 6:29 am
  2. Were I an Israeli, I’d seriously consider voting for Hadash. It seems like they are everything Meretz should be, but isn’t.

    2. Greg
    on January 31st, 2009 at 8:34 am
  3. Bibi should just replace his campaign logo with a picture of an erect penis and be done with it.
    *Sigh*
    I’m underwhelmed.

    3. Melinda
    on January 31st, 2009 at 10:39 am
  4. The green leaf ad is quite embarrassing. I’ve heard about it, but you have to watch to believe that it’s real.
    Livni’s ad missed the point, and Lieberman’s sure is scary.
    Lisa, have you decided who to vote for?

    @Yohay: I haven’t decided who to vote for yet, although I might, out of sheer terror at the alternative (as one friend says), vote for Livni. Lisa

    4. Yohay
    on January 31st, 2009 at 10:39 am
  5. Yeah, well, it is bleak. And yes, I too don’t believe that mere facts will sway the voters off Bibi…

    5. SnoopyTheGoon
    on January 31st, 2009 at 11:00 am
  6. Just don’t ask Hadash about gays. Especially about Palestinian gays and what they are doing to assist them. They tend to squirm a bit on that one … (hint, because it would offend certain people to admit that there *are* Palestinian gays and that the Palestinians – including the PA – aren’t exactly treating them very nicely …)

    Also – you didn’t mention the new green party – the only green party in the world with its own Rabbi.

    @Nominally Challenged: you pre-empted me, as like minded friends do. I’m going to write a separate post about Yerukim-Meimad. Lisa

    6. nominally challenged
    on January 31st, 2009 at 12:52 pm
  7. Ehud Barak has an oddly-shaped head. Bibi has scary eyebrows. Though they’re less scary than the eyebrows of the Archbishop of Canterbury, who I think wins the prize for scariest eyebrows.

    The Green Leaf party ad wins the prize for being the most horribly inappropriate ad of the bunch. When I first heard about it, I couldn’t believe that the person who told me was being serious. Someone must have been seriously high when they came up with that idea…and they should be sacked.

    I liked the idea of Hadash using Hebrew and Arabic in the ad, but this is a political party that generally says one thing in Hebrew and another thing in Arabic. It’s a shame that even our allegedly Jewish/Arab party resorts to such a practice. One day we’ll see a real cooperative party where not only is it Jewish/Arab, but where they don’t need to use one platform in Arabic and a different platform in Hebrew.

    7. Elianah
    on January 31st, 2009 at 3:05 pm
  8. I believe the Lieberman clip you posted is from the Meretz campaign, who insist on labelling him as a fascist-racist, when in fact his politics are not that far from theirs: two-state solution, territorial compromises, etc.

    I guess it’s easier for Meretz to bash Lieberman than to deal directly with their competitor for the hearts of the Tel Aviv crowd: Hadash.

    @Sharvul: I think it’s just really easy to bash Lieberman because he is humorless, anti-democratic and racist. He also lives in a (illegal) West Bank settlement. The only thing his definition of “territorial compromise” has in common with Meretz’s is the name. And he is well-known for employing racist language when speaking of or to Arabs. You’re right about Meretz competing with Hadash for Tel Aviv votes, though: that’s because Dov Kheinin ran an intelligent, relevant campaign for mayor.Lisa

    8. sharvul
    on January 31st, 2009 at 6:45 pm
  9. The Survivors/Green Leaf ad is definitely the best comic relief I’ve had in a long, long time….

    9. Sara
    on January 31st, 2009 at 6:46 pm
  10. You describe Hadash as ‘Socialist’, yet ‘Communist’ would be more appropriate (Rakah-Maki etc.).
    Also, you do give a skewed picture of why many Arab villages are underdeveloped (internal corruption and misuse of funds being the leading cause).

    @Daniel: The failure of the electricity company to connect a village to the national grid has no connection to internal corruption or misuse of funds. Lisa

    10. Daniel
    on January 31st, 2009 at 6:53 pm
  11. Thank you, Lisa, for the Green Leaf link! No longer do I need to raise the paper in the morning and mumble behind it when my undercover Torah Judaist informs me that I “did it again” last night, i.e.: chuckle in rememberance of his test results. Now I can look at him and say it had probably been for the Green Leaf ad.

    11. J.
    on January 31st, 2009 at 8:14 pm
  12. I got a laugh out of Melchior’s rant against “veteran politicians” as if he hasn’t been around for a decade, since 1999 (http://www.knesset.gov.il/mk/eng/mk_eng.asp?mk_individual_id_t=220)

    @Yisrael: I didn’t mention Melchior in this post, but I know the clip you mean: he doesn’t say “veteran politicians”; he says “veteran parties.” He left Labor, a veteran party, to form Hayerukim-Meimad. Lisa

    12. Yisrael Medad
    on January 31st, 2009 at 10:21 pm
  13. I have the distinct recollection of seeing communist red flags (with the hammer and sickle on them) at the gay pride march in Jerusalem last summer. I assumed they were people from Hadash – or was it some other group?

    @Rebecca: Red flags (for socialism) – yes; hammers and sickles (for the defunct USSR) – no. Lisa

    13. Rebecca
    on February 1st, 2009 at 5:59 am
  14. Lisa, thanks heaps for these — my simple (not deep) forensics last night in search of Israeli campaign ads didn’t render much, so I’m glad to come here and find the usual dish.

    My thoughts about Lieberman (and this is only because I read way too much post-Soviet stuff): think Beslan, the two Chechen Wars, the recent Georgian campaign, and the manner in which uninvolved Chechen citizens of Russia are treated Russia’s major urban centres — especially Moscow — and you’ll get an idea why he continues to rant as he does at all the Arab MKs. I have come to know well how a man like Lieberman’s mind is constructed. Anna Politkovskaya wrote it best in her PUTIN’S RUSSIA — just like 90% of Israeli society was “for” the war, >95% of Russian citizens are pro-discrimination of Chechens = Muslims in their country. Replace Russia for Israel, and Chechens for Arab Israelis/Palestinians, and the Lierberman transformation is complete.

    Never forget that Lieberman remains deeply involved with the Russian scene — news coverage from there has got to affect his worldview in no small way. Coupled with the Israeli pressure cooker, this is what you get…

    Believe me, a silent majority of Israelis outside of the major cities thinks just like him.

    14. Adam Daniel Mezei
    on February 1st, 2009 at 10:39 am
  15. I thought Barak was the worse prime minister in recent history…

    I’m voting for Bibi because is wants to lower my income taxes, lower corporate taxes and stood up to Shas and lowered child subsidies.
    Bibi is the only one who even mentioned the economy in his adds and seems to be the only one that understands economics in the government. He single handedly saved the Israeli economy in the early 2000s.

    And, he speaks English….

    If Israel is going down in a nuclear poof, I want to make sure its with a small, unbloated capitalist government and with FDI flowing in.

    15. Naomi
    on February 1st, 2009 at 12:26 pm
  16. A couple of notes of interest re: this year’s election spots

    1. Hadash, interestingly, is actively going after the Tel Aviv hipster vote this time around. Basically saying, ‘You were thinking of voting Meretz, how about being even more hardcore?’

    2. It should be noted that there are actually two marijuana legalization parties running. There is the Aleh Yarok (“Green Leaf”) party, which has run for Knesset the last three or four elections. The ad above actually comes from a splinter group called Bogrei Aleh Yarok (“Green Leaf Graduates”) who claim that they are the “real” Green Leaf Party. (Insert own ‘Life of Brian’ joke here).

    These are the ones that banded together with the Holocaust survivors, for reasons that I can only speculate.

    The “real” Green Leaf party, now headed by provocative comedian Gil Kopatsch, also has a great campaign ad. In it, Kopatsch sits on the grave of David Ben Gurion smoking a joint and lamenting the lack of leadership in the country today. And also offers the Father of our Country a drag. B-G’s relatives have been unamused.

    3. Lieberman has gone from being a crypto-fascist in the 2006 campaign to an overt fascist in this one. I’m surprised you didn’t link to Lieberman’s latest and most successful campaign — “Without Loyalty there can be no Citizenship” which is directed at Israeli Arabs. Depressingly, Lieberman’s popularity seems to have grown even stronger now that he is no longer coy about how he really feels.

    16. Shai
    on February 1st, 2009 at 1:38 pm
  17. “Note the smarmy, self-satisfied expression”
    Do not make the mistake of a selffulfilling prophecy, mr. B’s smile is genuine.
    The person is watching you and does have his own thoughts about you (might have seen a smear of lipstick at an unlogical spot?!) and is not in a way of remote controll connected to your thoughts.
    You’re line is in relation to our evolutionary background of survival.

    17. Mongrel
    on February 1st, 2009 at 2:05 pm
  18. You didn’t mention HaIhud HaLeumi – http://www.leumi.org.il/english/ – Just maybe we will get more votes than anyone thinks… and it’s the ONLY party you can trust NOT to make deals with the USA or concessions to the Arabs for a piece of paper which won’t bring peace.

    @Suzanne: This post is not meant to be a comprehensive survey of all the political parties; it’s just a sampling of campaign clips that I thought were interesting. But now that you mention HaIhud HaLeumi, I think it does deserve a mention. I’ll call the post: “Flirting with Fascism in Israel.” Thank you for providing the inspiration. Lisa

    18. Suzanne Pomeranz
    on February 1st, 2009 at 8:59 pm
  19. Oh.My.God. You were serious about the liquids. Just snarfed my drink.
    xo
    A

    19. adina
    on February 2nd, 2009 at 3:37 am
  20. Excellent isra-politics 101.

    I keep being amused, every single time, of how similar Israeli and Italian politics are.

    Fragmented politics, govts falling at an almost yearly base, unclear relationship between Church and State, people yelling at each other like kids in the Parliament… neat.

    anyway, we must credit Israelis for one thing: in Italy no major party would ever chose a woman as main candidate.

    20. Anna Momigliano
    on February 2nd, 2009 at 1:27 pm
  21. Livni’s ad is AWFUL! I heard it on the radio this morning, and since I wasn’t totally paying attention, I couldn’t figure out why an ad talking about Barak was listed as a Kadima commercial (I was making sandwiches and getting the kids dressed). That’s such terrible marketing: it goes on and on about a guy, when she’s a woman. No matter what the message is, it still focuses you on a guy. But besides that, she’s basically saying that if she was a guy, she’d be a shoe-in for PM since she’s perfect for the job. So basically, if you don’t vote for Livni, you’re chauvinist. Nice.

    But the Marijuana-Holocaust Survivors party takes the cake. I don’t think the best political satirists could have come up with that one. “It’s our moral obligation as Holocaust survivors to legalize marijuana.” Lordy lord.

    21. Miriam Schwab
    on February 2nd, 2009 at 4:48 pm
  22. I am not familiar with that specific example (and the link doesn’t provide any concrete information), so I cannot comment upon that directly. My comment stands with regards to the general statement preceding the example.

    As for Lieberman – although I do not support him personally, I find your comments about him typical of your recent attitude – nothing to offer but hauteur and rudeness. I’m not sure what you hope to achieve by this. You are relegating yourself towards a choir-preacher position. You constantly espouse the virtues and necessity of dialog with others, yet you seem to have forgotten “others” might include Israelis with a more right-wing view of the conflict than yours; to them all you have to offer, it seems, is a general smug disdain.

    @Daniel: “hauteur and rudeness” are, I think, rather more characteristic of your choice of expression. If you want to pick a fight, please go somewhere else. If you have a counter-argument based on concrete examples to offer, welcome. Lisa

    22. Daniel
    on February 2nd, 2009 at 5:10 pm
  23. Terrific post.

    Just a small correction (from a political scientist). You wrote “That means that the head of the party which wins the plurality of seats gets to be prime minister.”

    There actually is no assumption that the head of the party with the plurality will become PM. Or even be given a chance. The president (despite being basically ceremonial otherwise) “invites” the leader who, in the president’s estimation (after consultations with all parties), is most likely to be able to form a majority-supported government.

    Naturally, this invitation almost always goes to the head of the largest party. But it does not have to–and this leader might fail even if invited.

    This may actually come to play this time. Livni could be the head of the largest party, but be unable to form a government (although I think she could, in the form of a ‘unity’ government with all four of the largest parties).

    25. MSS
    on February 10th, 2009 at 7:16 pm

3 Trackbacks

  1. By Israeli election ads « Beats and Pieces on February 4, 2009 at 1:08 pm

    [...] 4, 2009 · No Comments Lisa Goldman’s round up of the Israeli election campaign features some of the TV ads for the various political parties. The Holocaust Survivors and Green [...]

  2. [...] viewing, at Lisa Goldman’s blog. I agree with Lisa that Livni’s is depressing. And, while my Hebrew is pretty bad, I can [...]

  3. By antimateur.org on February 18, 2009 at 10:18 pm

    ~…

    Auch wenn die Wahl in Israel schon vorbei ist, möchte ich auf dieses sehr …interessante Video hinweisen, das zumindest laut Lisa Goldman, wo ich es her habe, authentisch ist. Man mag es nicht recht glauben, aber bitte, seht selbst.

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